kfjcnjkdbvncdw:

beboqueen:

incises:

fugrats:

100 Completely Accurate World Accents

omg

omfg

oh.

(Source: thissummersession)

  • 20 hours ago
  • 26144

(Source: lewky)

  • 20 hours ago
  • 343

My brother called and this is what happened before I could say hello

Him: For your birthday, I DECIDED I'D GIVE YOU THE BEST POSSIBLE PRESENT
Me: What?
Him: I'll sleep over mom's on Sunday so you can wake me up on your birthday. No need to thank me.
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: HAHA, okay, yeah best birthday present.
  • 20 hours ago

It was a good Friday.

Classes didn’t feel too long, pretty sure I failed my algebra 2 test, but it was a good day. Classes were really chill, and track running a mile barefoot, not so bad. Peter dropped me a couple times and Elvis called me a loser the first time, HE DOESN’T EVEN KNOW MY NAME, whatever. Turned in my book report to Mr. Early and he gave me the extra signature I needed. 
After school I was with Marta, her sister, Kumar, Daniel, Danny, and Mando. We played this game and I got to be the killer once, a milf the last time, and a civilian. “YOU KILLED ME!” best fucking believe I did. 

  • 20 hours ago
  • 1
  • 1 day ago
  • 11866
  • 1 day ago
  • 3913

Did you hear about the Italian chef that died?

He pasta way.

we cannoli do so much

his legacy will become a pizza history.

here today, gone tomato

How sad that he ran out of thyme.

Sending olive my prayers to the family.

His wife is really upset. Cheese still not over it.

(Source: pointy-earedbastard)

  • 1 day ago
  • 67356
omg

omg

  • 1 day ago
  • 56353
DO YOU SEE MY RIBS OMG. well only 2. one on each side. but i’ve wanted this for so long.

DO YOU SEE MY RIBS OMG. well only 2. one on each side. but i’ve wanted this for so long.

  • 1 day ago
  • 1

iamkrislyn replied to your photo: GOT MY PROM TICKET Y’ALL.

I want to invade.

 invade if you must, it’s .. in simi valley

  • 1 day ago
GOT MY PROM TICKET Y’ALL.

GOT MY PROM TICKET Y’ALL.

  • 1 day ago
  • 2
  • 2 days ago
  • 23876

did you know if you say bloody mary 3 times in the mirror at 1am your mom will tell you to shut the fuck up and go to bed

(Source: nuggits2)

  • 2 days ago
  • 42849

I miss my friend.

Best friend - an overrated term. She didn’t use that label. She said we were really close. But since she got in a relationship with her boyfriend, things were changed. I knew we wouldn’t talk as often, but now we’re not even friends. I don’t know, I miss going over her house— kind of. I miss talking to her. Who am I supposed to go to Porto’s with? We didn’t even go because her boyfriend ruined everything the last time I was at her house. Which was a month and ten days ago. That was the last time I talked to her. I got so upset when she changed plans a minute after we decided where we’d have dinner. A minute later, we’re no longer going out to a Salvadorian restaurant, but she’s going to her boyfriend’s house to watch a movie. I got so upset, that I was like BAM BAM BAM, I kept telling people, because no matter how many times I said it I knew nothing would change, it would always be her boyfriend over me. It was wrong of me to tell people, especially the amount of people I told, and telling the big mouth of the school, I felt that I could get it off my chest. But I couldn’t. I still have the urge to just say it. I would always question myself “why am i still friends with her?” I don’t know, I guess I jinxed myself. I do miss her, but I know even if we were still friends it wouldn’t matter because I’d just be upset that she wouldn’t talk to me often. 
What’s worse, being upset or sad?

  • 2 days ago

I just want to curl up into a ball and kind of just cry. I don’t know, today has been a good day but I just, I’m tired. And it’s dumb of me, but even though I had a good day I just feel kind of empty and I can’t cry. My chest hurts but I. I don’t know. I think I’ll just try to sleep or something.

  • 2 days ago